anne and espi, yeah, I am learning an unbelievable amount about messed up hunger cures by using this gowearfit and thedaily plate. a 500 calorie deficit really feels like a big deficit!!! yuk!! I have had 1750 calories today and I feel hungry. my burn will be around 2200-2300 because all I did was walk easy today. calorie deficits totally suck!
Hi Wendy -
I am totally with you on this. A deficit does not feel very good. You are doing awesome and I can see that you are keeping you goals and dreams in the very front of your mind to get through it. I just wanted to tell you that I have found your posts very inspiring and often when I'm hungry I think, if Wendy can be a bit uncomfortable to reach her goals then so can I.
oh, leah, thank you SO much. I really needed to hear this today. I woke up around 2am and totally couldn't get back to sleep--was SO hungry. so I had a banana and fell back asleep.
I realized that for my bench press event, I really need to weigh in at around 142 on my scale in the am (no clothes) to weigh 145 on their scale--I have to weigh with running clothes AND shoes. I need that 3 pound wiggle room. this way, I can bench using 85 pounds instead of 90 pounds. BIG difference.
the good news, I am 151.5 today, the lowest scale weight I have been in 20 plus years!!! the bad news, to reach 142 by my competition, it is a fairly aggressive 1.1 pound per week loss or 564 calorie deficit daily from now until march 5.
I know I can do this. and I really value your support Leah. it helps to know that I am not the only one going into the pain cave this year. I know it will be worth it to push myself in this direction. I have to keep telling myself that 1700 calories is not starving! there is plenty of nutrition in these calories. and on days that I burned 2900, I am eating 2300, clearly not starving, lol.
I am also getting calipers every 2 weeks during this time, so I can make sure that percent bodyfat is trending downward as well. don't want to rely only on the scale, but unfortunately, the bench press gods DO rely on the scale!!
thanks jill! Your experience has been invaluable to me. Thanks!
Awe chloe that is sweet! I am working on my writing. I need an editor! Oh yeah and a publisher! Someday I might just take the plunge
Tom thank YOU for challenging me to consider the possibilities many months ago. Wish I were going to be at the summit to thank you in person. But I will be at running camp kicking major ass!
it all starts with the mind, but the thoughts, the intention aren't enough. action needs to come next. dream it, believe it, plan it, execute it, celebrate it. I always had a dream I could run Boston. Finally, I believe it. I found a plan, tweaked it. Now I'm executing the plan. Lots of random things might happen that delay the execution of the plan. like the stupid MRI of my knee that I had friday might come back with bad news. that is life. But I believe that I am supposed to be doing this right now. To prove to myself and to others that dreams are made to be accomplished. that anything you can vision you can manifest.
Life is full of richness just waiting to be experienced, we only have to face our fears, lose the armor, and get after it!
and no doubt, endurance sports (my chosen poison) are clearly easier for EVERYONE in a leaner body. this is true. what wasn't true was the power that I placed on my fat. like people who believe that once you are thin, you will suddenly have the perfect marriage, the perfect career, the perfect children. I believed that if only I were thin, I could be an amazing runner, and just effortlessly glide across the finish with my miss america wave, only this time, I would be a fast chick. no puking required
You are so right, Wendy. We're ALL working hard to achieve our goals. Though some may have genetics on their side giving them a little boost, we all have to work hard to be where we want to be. Let's not trivialize someone's hard work by calling it easy just because it looks easy from our vantage point...
thanks jill! Your experience has been invaluable to me. Thanks!
Awe chloe that is sweet! I am working on my writing. I need an editor! Oh yeah and a publisher! Someday I might just take the plunge
Tom thank YOU for challenging me to consider the possibilities many months ago. Wish I were going to be at the summit to thank you in person. But I will be at running camp kicking major ass!
I'll be your editor...well...proofreader! I've actually proofread entire college textbooks just because I couldn't stand all the errors and typos. I got a call from one of the publishers after I submitted all of my corrections to them and they told me when I wanted a job, to let them know! LOL! I've even offered my "services" to a fitness guru around here.
oh jane that is fantastic, consider yourself hired. course I have to get the book deal first. oh yeah, and that little matter of qualifying for boston, then actually doing it!!
scale 152.5
burned 1991
eaten 1904
deficit 87
today is a heavy cardio day, swimming now then track tonight. bigger deficit in store for tomorrow.
we definitely don't do weightlifting for the calorie burn!!! it sucks that I burned under 2000 with my weightlifting session and all. damn sedentary lifestyle!
I'll be your editor...well...proofreader! I've actually proofread entire college textbooks just because I couldn't stand all the errors and typos. I got a call from one of the publishers after I submitted all of my corrections to them and they told me when I wanted a job, to let them know! LOL! I've even offered my "services" to a fitness guru around here.
Sometimes errors are really charming... like the next one.
Quote:
Originally Posted by fengshway
anne and espi, yeah, I am learning an unbelievable amount about messed up hunger cures by using this gowearfit and thedaily plate. a 500 calorie deficit really feels like a big deficit!!! yuk!! I have had 1750 calories today and I feel hungry. my burn will be around 2200-2300 because all I did was walk easy today. calorie deficits totally suck!
Hunger cues = signs sent out by the body you are supposed to eat = essential for IE/intuitive eating . This is what I used and meant ...
Hunger cures = apart from solving the world hunger problem , finding tricks to delude the body into thinking it's not starving while on a (large or even small) deficit.
So swim practice was fantastic today. Two new very fit triathletes were in my lane today and they could not keep the pace I was doing. One of them is a guy! Once he gets a bit of swim fitness back he will be a good person to push me as I get more swim fitness back.
And julie my bff decided to come back on Tuesdays so that was like old times gossiping in the shower! She is a newlywed and they moved way south and we moved way north. So glad she is driving up to swim with us. Workout was hard today lots of 200's all out. And I have track tonight!
You rock. I added something from one of the posts on the previous page to my signature
__________________ It all starts with the mind, but the thoughts, the intention aren't enough. Action needs to come next. Dream it, believe it, plan it, execute it, celebrate it. - Wendy
Awe (blushes) thanks! I need this today- my knee mri shows a little cartilage flap. They are fine with me running as long as I don't have pain. I likely did this when I wrecked my bike. Will know more when I see the sports med doc on thurs.
I am NOT going to let this get me down. I am in such a good place with my food. If I have to stop my training at any point I know how to maintain! I actually lost the most fat when I stopped running. Running revs up my appetite like nothing else!
actually my primary care doc called me and he is nervous about the MRI and doesn't want me to run til I see the sports med doc in person on thursday. I was bummed. I did have a bit of a run in with some cave aged gouda cheese last night. and some blueberries and pineapples. and some peanut butter. didn't log everything.
but promptly got my ass out of bed this morning, dusted myself off and logged everything. and it really wasn't as bad as I thought.
scale 152.25
burned 2286
eaten 2574
288 cal surplus
ok, so now here's the dilemma. I need to get back to being uberfocused. I had an evening of fuck-it-all-let's-just-do-maintenance-while-you-heal-from-your-biking-injury. and I don't even have all of the data yet! running that fast 5k put me in a mindspace to tolerate hunger, to meet my goal 5k. and somehow, even the mere possiblity of taking time off from running, and perhaps even delaying some of my goals for a bit, removed the uberfocus. How can I get the uberfocus to be part of who I am? why does it have to be dependent on an external goal?
I guess I haven't convinced myself yet that getting leaner is really a worthy goal in and of itself. my body fat is normal now. my scale weight is solidly in the normal range. my disease risk is normal. so now what? why get leaner? leaner would make running easier. leaner would look better in certain clothes. can't really come up with a lot more, to be honest.
so I guess my question to fellow forum friends who are already at a bodyfat and weight that the charts consider "normal": if you are currently trying to get leaner, what motivates you to get leaner?
Wendy, for me, I guess it was this picture I had in my head of how I wanted to look (hence, the title of my log!). I wanted to get out of the shower and see myself in the mirror and thing "DAMN, I look good!". I knew I was in the "healthy" range for height/weight, but I just didn't LOVE what I saw. So, my journey started. I'm certainly not there yet, but having that vision in my head is what propels me to the next level and to reach for loftier goals. I actually don't know if I'll ever get there, but at least I am always shooting for something!
My sister asked me a similar question......something along the lines of "what are you eventually hoping to achieve?" I told her I honestly wasn't sure where I would end up but I did tell her that when I sit down, I want there to be NO STOMACH at all when I look down. THAT may be wishful thinking, but it's the ultimate goal for me!! LOL!
Jane that helps me so much! I can really relate. When I started with the first challenge, I was just outside the normal place. Because I had been so obese, I seriously did like the way I looked back then. But of course, that was before I saw your transformation. And before I believed I could get leaner. Now that I am significantly leaner, I seriously don't ever want to go back there. I really do love the way I look now. And that was the difference between 34percent versus the 26 I am now. So maybe the difference between 26 and 23 would result in a similar change- maybe once I get there, I would never want to go back! Like someone said earlier in my log, gaining is always an option! So maybe pursuing a leaner body might be a fun thing to do independent of my performance goals. You've given me something to ponder jane. Thanks as always!
Hey Wendy! I posted this in my log, but wanted to make sure you knew you were inspiring me!!!!
Quote:
I'm soooo not a fan of the high rep workouts, and seriously was thinking of just moving on to the next group of exercises that are lower reps - and then Wendy popped into my head! And I decided to join Wendy in the Pain Cave! I'm going to finish these workouts! I've finished the first week - only three more weeks - I CAN DO IT!!
ok, so now here's the dilemma. I need to get back to being uberfocused. I had an evening of fuck-it-all-let's-just-do-maintenance-while-you-heal-from-your-biking-injury. and I don't even have all of the data yet! running that fast 5k put me in a mindspace to tolerate hunger, to meet my goal 5k. and somehow, even the mere possiblity of taking time off from running, and perhaps even delaying some of my goals for a bit, removed the uberfocus. How can I get the uberfocus to be part of who I am? why does it have to be dependent on an external goal?
I guess I haven't convinced myself yet that getting leaner is really a worthy goal in and of itself. my body fat is normal now. my scale weight is solidly in the normal range. my disease risk is normal. so now what? why get leaner? leaner would make running easier. leaner would look better in certain clothes. can't really come up with a lot more, to be honest.
so I guess my question to fellow forum friends who are already at a bodyfat and weight that the charts consider "normal": if you are currently trying to get leaner, what motivates you to get leaner?
Wendy, I've been thinking about this all day. I am already lean, probably leaner than most women will ever see but I continue on this journey. Like Jane, my sister asked me what my ultimate goal is/why am I working so hard/for what? I really didn't know how to answer her.
Before I gave up my career as an intensive care nurse (after having my second child), I would have defined myself as a nurse. Then when my kids were small, I devoted everything to raising them. I was a mom. Now that my boys will soon be 10, 12 and 14 they don't need me in the same way that they needed me when they were little. I don't feel like "I'm a mom" anymore. But who am I. My husband's wife? I want to be ME. I feel like if I can reach my fitness goals, I will be successful at something just for me. I can't quite express my feelings out loud to my sister or even dh because sometimes I think it sounds selfish. But reaching my goal (even if that goal changes over time) will help me define myself as a strong woman, an athlete or even a beautiful buff muscled individual.
I'm not competitive. I'm way too shy to be on stage and I really have no athletic abilities like running or swimming so I don't have any major performance goals but I really want to look good. I want to feel good in a bathing suit. I want others to see me and think "wow, she looks awesome". Is that shallow? I hope not because as a trudge along trying to look better, I see positive changes happening in all aspects of my life.
I know you have your career so maybe you can't relate but I just wanted to share my feelings.
Having said all that, sometimes I wonder if I'm having a midlife crisis.
Wendy - what did you find out about the knee? I can understand the attitude you may have had last night. I really do.
I was coming in here to post all my thoughts about why I want to push and meet my various different goals, but Chloe pretty describes my body recomp goals and if she is shallow - so am I. Obviously not the "lean" part.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chloe2
Wendy, I've been thinking about this all day. I am already lean, probably leaner than most women will ever see but I continue on this journey. Like Jane, my sister asked me what my ultimate goal is/why am I working so hard/for what? I really didn't know how to answer her.
Before I gave up my career as an intensive care nurse (after having my second child), I would have defined myself as a nurse. Then when my kids were small, I devoted everything to raising them. I was a mom. Now that my boys will soon be 10, 12 and 14 they don't need me in the same way that they needed me when they were little. I don't feel like "I'm a mom" anymore. But who am I. My husband's wife? I want to be ME. I feel like if I can reach my fitness goals, I will be successful at something just for me. I can't quite express my feelings out loud to my sister or even dh because sometimes I think it sounds selfish. But reaching my goal (even if that goal changes over time) will help me define myself as a strong woman, an athlete or even a beautiful buff muscled individual.
I'm not competitive. I'm way too shy to be on stage and I really have no athletic abilities like running or swimming so I don't have any major performance goals but I really want to look good. I want to feel good in a bathing suit. I want others to see me and think "wow, she looks awesome". Is that shallow? I hope not because as a trudge along trying to look better, I see positive changes happening in all aspects of my life.
I know you have your career so maybe you can't relate but I just wanted to share my feelings.
Having said all that, sometimes I wonder if I'm having a midlife crisis.
Um, yeah that.
__________________
Ginger
"The miracle isn't that I finished. The miracle is that I had the courage to start." ~ John Bingham
Great posts Wendy. I have my fingers crossed for you and the knee. Heck, I live through your running so it better not be bad. LOL!
WRT your question about being at BMI and still working on it... I honestly don't know what motivates me except I have always had a goal to look in the mirror and really appreciate the body that I have. I am there already but I am fine tuning now and to get there I know I have to go through discomfort with food. Either too much or too little. When I am in deficit, I find a whole bunch of stuff to do that keeps my mind off food. I walk, clean, run, bike and just plain move. That is the only thing that keeps me from eating the house when I am hungry. The good news is that it gets easier for me (both ways) as I do these cycles.
__________________
The BIGGER I get the smaller you look
chloe, that was awesome and very well written. I actually relate very well to what you have written, and you are able to articulate some things that I have been feeling but just didn't know how to express. my work involves giving a lot to others, and I think, like you and ginger, I really want to do something for ME. I love that others already perceive me as a strong, fit woman. I love that some guy thought I was the aerobics instructor last month, lol. and I guess part of me just wants to keep pursuing that, because I definitely still have some bodyfat to lose. and I love what you said about your physique goals spilling over into other aspects of your life too. I have certainly found that as I have become leaner, and there is no reason not to expect that this would continue as I get even leaner.
(((ginger))) thanks! I will know more about the knee this afternoon, I see the sports med doc. guess if you and chloe are shallow, so I am I! love my performance goals, but sometimes those get put on hold!! thanks for sharing your thoughts too.
thanks karla, I have my fingers and toes crossed too. really hoping for the best
and today's great news, that dovetails nicely with this discussion!!
weight 150.5!!!!
new scale low! I have one of those beam doctor scales, so very very soon, I will be using the 100 pound one instead of the 150 one for the big part of the number!! that will be thrilling, because I had this very same scale when I had to use the 200 one as the big one.
I suspect that I have been lower for a few weeks now, but lifting really makes me retain fluid. when I take a break, the fluid leaves.
Look at you go on the weightloss, Wendy! Too cool. Good luck at the doctor today and report back when you find out. You are prompting to buckle down and make my appointment today to get the ankle looked at.
I was pondering your question last night, when I should have been sleeping, LOL. I wanted to add that it is most definitely something that is so special to me (this process and chapter in my life), because it is for me. I started putting my goals and dreams out on the table and made going to the gym habit for everyone, even though it wasn't easy.
And, wow to catch a glmipse of a new muscle or see my body in motion and seeing how strong it is and how much it can do - is super cool to me and I want to keep it that way.
__________________
Ginger
"The miracle isn't that I finished. The miracle is that I had the courage to start." ~ John Bingham
)
And I decided to join Wendy in the Pain Cave! I'm going to finish these workouts! I've finished the first week - only three more weeks - I CAN DO IT!!
Linear Mode
