Someone call 911! Cause I'm starting a fire.

[Iamjennmedic]

God you know that sounds great but there are a couple problems with that
1) I have to look at my children each day and know that I am doing the right things for them, that I am the bigger 'guy' in the whole thing because I love them
2) I am scared he will try to beat me up

Ummm ya so those are my two best reasons for not going to the papers and putting the loser on the front page. I should write an article on dead beat parents and how it affects the kids. The whole thing makes me sad. Worse thing right now is not knowing what to expect. I know that some time next week FRO is suspending his license and from there I will either have to drive my boys to his house (1/2 hour each way) at my expense, or he picks them up with one of his loser drinking buddies. I won't sleep the whole time they are gone. The last time this happened I would drop them off, and of course not leave car seats for the boys bc he shouldn't be driving w/o a license, and I found out he took them out numerous times without car seats in his van. So fom the last time FRO did this he also got nasty over the phone with me and in person, my saving grace is that I now live at my parents and he is afraid of my Dad. Also he sued me to try and rescind the arrears he owed and have me forfeit all future support payments. Well first he tried to trick me into it, but I am not as stupid as he seems to think. In short I feel like I am walking on eggshells and have to watch over my shoulder. This is so not a good feeling. I had hoped the last time that it would end. I am very close just to giving in this time, its not right for my boys but it is getting to be too much for me.

[Bill2380]

I am very close just to giving in this time, its not right for my boys but it is getting to be too much for me.

That's his plan.

[Iamjennmedic]

Originally Posted by Bill2380

That's his plan.

Which is why I will see it through, I just hope my body can handle all the stress. For my children I keep at it. I am hoping that if I have to go to court again and we get the same judge as the last three times that he will get mad that his orders were not followed. I just don't get how badly the system here fails at making deadbeats pay up, one way or another. They really should have a public listing of those who don't pay with pictures. I truely believe that is may save someone else from going through the same thing with the same person. Or at the very least shame them into paying up.

[I. Kay]

I would sincerely enjoy decimating his skull with a pair of scissors. However, I hope the judge comes up with a more practical solution.

Hang in there, Jenn. You are wonderful for fighting like you are. Your kids have a great mother. We have your back, in whatever way we can help.

[RedWifey]

I think you should send his pic and your story in to his new mortgage company...see what they think about what they've just signed up for!

It might be worth it for you to trade with him: you'll resend all the arrears that he owes you and he forfeits any rights to his kids. IMO, it's not worth the boys knowing a loser father who gets them into physical danger when they are with him, and is probably doing emotional damage at the same time. Just a thought.

Hey Ian, I'll start cutting LOTs of paper with my scissors to get them nice and dull

[Iamjennmedic]

LOL
I love you guys! I am hoping that this time they actually do something that will work. I do know that he was reported to the credit bureau. I guess that doesn't really do much though dince he was still able to buy a house. The system really makes it easy for deadbeat parents to get away with everything.

[Garrocha]

Your kids are the important part of all of this and as long as you continue to keep them first you are doing the right thing. I can see they are your main concern and that makes you a wonderful mom!
Keep your head up!

[gregl515]

If you have to go to a hearing, it wouldn't hurt to take a friend for emoptional support. Sometimes local Survivors Organizations can help as well. Maybe you said this already, but why can't they attach part of his paycheck? So much for current support and so much for arrears? Can they reduce the arrears to a judgment and put a lien on his house? I know they can do that almost everywhere down here.

[Iamjennmedic]

The house is new, so far I don't have to go to the hearing, not until he decides to come after me again. I am hoping that this time no one will touch the case for him. He works for himself so he hides most of the money he makes.

[Iamjennmedic]

Day 1 Week one

Warm-up
elbow tucks 10x
press and reach 10x
PNF diagnoals 12x
arm circles 20x each direction
reach, turn and lift 6x

Workout

Superset A
neutral grip Db bench- 35lbs; 35lbs; 40lbs; 40lbs
chest supported rows- 35lbs; switched to Db rows see notes- 35lbs; 40lbs; 40lbs
1 min rest

Superset B
lateral raise thumbs up- 10lbsx8; 12.5lbs x 7; 12.5lbs x 6; 15lbs x 5; 15lbs x 4
Reverse flys, thumbs down- 22.5lbs x 4; 22.5lbs 5; 17.5lbs x 6; 17.5lbs x 7; 17.5lbs x 8
20 sec rest

Superset C
chins neutral grip- bw x 6; 25lbs assist on the rest- 6; 5; 4
supine grip- bw x 1; 25lbs assist - 1; 2; 40lbs assist-3

Superset D

Db protractions- 3 x 15 @ 30lbs
Db external rotations- 15lbs x 10; 12.5lbs x 10; 10lbs x10

Done! I hadn't eaten yet before working out so the results show that I spent the entire morning at the passport office. First day of new new routine I really like it so far.

[I. Kay]

Good job, Jenn. Hey, at least you're lifting again!

A little food will go a long way towards making a routine work.

How did you do 22.5 and 17.5 lbs on the reverse flyes?

[gregl515]

Originally Posted by Iamjennmedic

The house is new, so far I don't have to go to the hearing, not until he decides to come after me again. I am hoping that this time no one will touch the case for him. He works for himself so he hides most of the money he makes.

If he says he is not making money, why won't the judge force him to get a straight job? In some Courts, judges have thrown guys in jail until the find a job or pay the arrears.

[Iamjennmedic]

Ian in the one section of db's they have some 1/2 sizes

Greg, the judge has yet to do that, they seem to be more concerned with making sure he has enough money for beer and smokes and the other living expenses. He tries to say he makes under $12,000 a year Lies!!

[gregl515]

The purchase price and mortgage agreement are public records. Look at what he paid for the house and how much he put down. You may also be able to get a copy of his mortgage agreement where he tells a bank what he makes in order to get a loan. In the US, you sign those things under penalty of perjury and can get prosecuted for loan fraud. If you could get this information, you might put him in the interesting positon of explaining to the court whether he lied to get a loan or to avoid support. Did he purchase his car or truck new? Did he sign a loan agreement and credit application for the car it would be the same thing.
A lawyer could tell you how to get those documents, but I'm betting that, in your line of work, you know a police officer or two who could tell you how to get the loan information. Does Canada's support statute allow you to subpoena these records? Do any of you Canadians know? Certainly the Canadian lawyers on this site would have access to the discovery rules and could tell you if you can obtain these documents. It would really be interesting if you could subpoena those loan documents and they had a consistent income that differed from his alleged income for support and, I assume, taxes. Finally, I got a guy to cave who owned a new and used car dealership by threatening to subpoena his accouting records. He caved because there was probably more mischief on the books than what he would save by fighting her. I believe he paid more than he had to to keep anyone from going through the books.

I don't know if any of this helps, but it may give you ideas. Another one is that, if he works construction or a trade, you could have friends or investigators photograph him at various jobs and then he could explain to the court how much he was paid after you subpoena his clients and, if necessary their financial records to find out what they say they paid him.

[Iamjennmedic]

Greg you rock I am going to go look into these things.

[RacerBill]

Sorry, Jenn, I haven't checked in here in a few days. You're in my prayers.

And congratulations on finishing HT-1 and starting the new program!

Greg is really smart! It never ceases to amaze me how the friends here help each other out in so many ways.

[Cynic]

Originally Posted by Iamjennmedic

LOL Glad you like the new avatar, but no I don't have an outfit like that in my current wardrobe. I don't have a bod like that either so there ya go!

But do you have the voulge?

http://hea-www.harvard.edu/~fine/Fun/polearms.html

Ooo-EEEE-Oh...Whooooa-oh!