Mahler’s Monday Morning Motivator # 205 – Uncle Tom

[Mahler]

Mahler’s Monday Morning Motivator # 205 – Uncle Tom

Uncle Tom (03-10-08)

Today I attended a funeral for a man named Tom. He was my wife’s uncle. He was quite a remarkable man. I first met him when I was dating my wife over twenty-eight years ago, and took my leave of him today at a gravesite surrounded by family and friends standing in the snow.

I must admit that in those early years when I first knew him, I didn’t really warm up to him all that well. At family functions he would often drink a little too much and occasionally seemed to me to be a little nasty. But, beyond that, there emerged qualities that I would soon come to admire. He loved a good laugh, to dance, to sing and to play music. And, more revealing of this man, at least to me, was that he had three great loves in his life; his wife, Rita; his children and their families; and his faith.

Tom was a worker. It would be an understatement to simply say that he was always working. Oh, there are many of his generation that had that same sprit, that same need to produce and to make useful contributions in an ever changing and jaded world that seemed to want nothing more than to leave them behind. But, he was not about to let that happen. He owned his own shop where he made custom window shades, and over the years became a holdout in the trade as people gradually took their business to the cheap chain stores. Yet, he continued to work and work hard, literally up to the day he left this world at the age of eighty.

Tom contracted oral cancer at the age of 57. For literally more than a quarter of his life he endured the ravages of this disease and the many invasive procedures he had to undergo to control it. Over those last 23 years he had many surgeries, including the removal of his tongue and eventually his jawbone, leaving his face distorted and a once amiable smile, twisted beyond recognition. He was reduced to blending all of his food and choking it down in liquid form over the sink at each meal.

But, I tell you this. That in all the years of treatment, of the painful procedures, of the humiliation that the disease heaped upon him, that smile may have been taken from him, but the good humor and tenderness behind it were always there and never faltered for a moment. The drive and the energy of one who was simply unwilling to give up were always in evidence.

How inspiring when you think of it. How may of us could endure as much for so long and yet remain so positive, so right with the world. I have a feeling I will think of Tom often, for though he is my wife’s uncle, he is someone who I have been fortunate to know, someone who has added to my own existence. He is my uncle, too. My uncle Tom.

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Have a Great Week!
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[LisaS]

My sympathies on your loss, John. Uncle Tom and your family will be in my prayers.

He sounds like a good man who knew what was important in life.

[GG300]

My condolences John, he sounds like a wonderful Man.

Thanks for sharing

[Tom@foresight]

Sorry for your loss,

TOM

[Deserve]

I hope I would have the strength to endure what that man went through. My condolences.

[Jean-Paul]

Sounds like a tough guy... I can see why he was inspirational to you.

[OldGuy]

Sorry for your family's loss, John. He sounds like he was a great man and will live long in everyone's memory.

[gregl515]

I am sorry for your loss. Your uncle was a strong man. I don't know if I could go through that. Still, he is typical of that generation. So many of those guys worked hard as a given. They slogged through whatever challenges life threw at them with stoic acceptance. They soldiered on with gentle good humor and strength. Thank you for introducing us to your uncle.

[kingkop182]

Thanks. John

[K-Court]

Thank you, John, for this inspirational tale. My sincere condolences on your and Ruth's loss.

[GinnyLou]

I am sorry for your loss, but grateful that you shared the story.