After swearing “by the moon, and the stars” that I would never do it again, “ooops! I did it again”, and seems that I never cease to be amazed of the circus that surrounds on-line dating.
Even made the mistake to go to CA (I live in MN) thinking, “Yes, this is the one” only to realized, like with many other gals I encountered before, that their profiles and pictures DON’T match with the flesh and bones in front of me. I don’t understand why in their profile under “body type” they always say “athletic” or “average”, but easily they need to loose at least 20 lbs to look a “little normal”. They lie about their age as well, and a gal from Chicago even sent me picture s when she was 10 years younger, and VERY slim.
Also, I don’t understand the need in posting pictures “glamour shots” style when in a normal day these women don’t look even remotely close to that.
Funny, but now some Russian girls are contacting me (they find me, I swear!). Interesting, they write pretty much the same script after the second email. (“Don’t like Russian men. Drink too much. No romantic…”). By the 4th or 5th email the say something like this:” I love your country and I want to walk with you holding hands and kissing you under the stars”. Yes, they are gorgeous and sexy, but…no, gracias!
I know of some couples that have met through these kind of services, but more are the horror stories I have heard and read.
Any opinion on this?
Looks like I’m venting. Oh, well, maybe I am.
I've dabbled in online dating. Frankly, I think it sucks and it almost completely destroyed any fun that is to be had in meeting someone of the opposite sex for me. It has worked for some people - and I know it is VERY common in NYC, in fact I don't know any single person here who hasn't at least tried it.
My advice: Stay away! I know it's tempting, especially during those dry spells; but be strong and don't give in!
Never tried it, can't bring myself to do so. I've heard good things about certain sites which aim at a more restricted membership, e.g., I've heard of people who have used a Jewish singles online dating service with some success.
Originally posted by russ: Never tried it, can't bring myself to do so. I've heard good things about certain sites which aim at a more restricted membership, e.g., I've heard of people who have used a Jewish singles online dating service with some success.
quote:Originally posted by russ: Never tried it, can't bring myself to do so. I've heard good things about certain sites which aim at a more restricted membership, e.g., I've heard of people who have used a Jewish singles online dating service with some success.
I've used Jdate. No. [/quote]So that's one vote in the 'don't try it' column [img]tongue.gif[/img]
Ive tried it before and luckily dont have any horror stroies. I met two wonderful girls, one of which Im still in contact.
You have to remember that with 60% of Americans overweight, the "average" is skewed in the fatty direction, so you should look for chicks who are specifically into sports and stuff. When I tried it I put maximum importance on athelticism and looks and then put a more realistic view on personality traits, not because I was shallow but because it was able to filter out the charlatans and the really emotional chicks.
Ive never found Russian chicks hot at all.
__________________
"The strongest steel goes through the hottest fires."-Anonymous
"When you begin to believe nothing is heavy, all weights become light." -Rossbow
"Just remember, somewhere there is a little Chinese girl warming up with your max."-Jim Convroy
"It's a round hole, dammit. Everyone fits."--Anonymous Mod at Strengthmill
In my experience, most women from Minnesota are HOT! Must be that Scandinavian blood or something, but I'll trade you a Southern belle for Twin Cities chick anytime [img]smile.gif[/img]
Oh yeah, I browse the online dating sites, but I have no interest in actually meeting anyone from there. I'll rely on coincidence.
__________________ No Magic Pill (the log)
My Movember page (yes, I'm slacking on pictures)
Originally posted by vin: A typical rule of online dating:
Chicks are fatter than they claim,
Guy are shorter.
You're probably right. I've browsed through JDate and noticed that a few of the women at my gym have posted profiles there. It was surprising to me in that several of them are attractive and seem outgoing enough. At least their profiles seem honest in terms of height/weight, but you never know about the personality traits.
Thanks for the replay. I will share some of my horror stories. It’s time to get them out of my system!!!)
The gal from Chicago was short, super masculine and square. I don’t even want to describe how she was dressing when we met the first time at the airport, this would be too long, I just want to say, I was shocked and thought: "this is most expensive and ridiculous date I ever had". She looked like a wrestler, no kidding here. Worst, she was not interested in boys (yes, she was lesbiana -but an ugly one-) I replayed to her (on-line) because she stated; “I would like to start a family”. We talked over the phone for months. I never understood why she never told me the truth.
The one in CA, totally the opposite. In her profile she clamed “athletic” and “vegetarian” she was either. She was anorexic and raw food eater. She was short and very skinny; suffer from epilepsy (and many other illness) with two 11-year twin boys. They loved me and we get along just fine (the kids and I). Just picture this: these boys (very thin) have never taste milk, ice-cream, pizza, eggs, and any normal thing that a kids eat (healthy or unhealthy) they only eat raw organic crap. The kids would come to the house to eat during their break, had no friends and will do their homework in the floor with a flash light, or walk around the house with a flashlight, at night. (Because she was teaching them to save energy). I left that mad house 3 days before planned (no, I was not staying there while I was in CA).
Third: She came from KY and stay with me. I want her out next day. She stayed 5. It was horrible (she stayed in different room the whole time. She was HUGE!!!).
The last one, she came without a formal invitation (she even said that she couldn’t believe God put me in her path, I thought that was weird. She was “so in love with me” she couldn’t wait to meet me, got a hotel here and flew from D.C. It was bad…and sad, for her).
One gal (super beautiful gal from Peru) I met in Salt Lake City (I was attending the University of Utah at that time), while I was at her place and we were too busy not longer watching the movie, right in that moment before to human beings can get to close, she dared to asked me the question no one else asked me before: “And…what kind of visa do you have?” I couldn’t believe she asked that!!! (I’m even laughing as I type this!) I said, as I laid back and looked puzzled into her eyes: “Student visa, I told you I’m student at ‘the U”, I have F1 Visa”. After that, she was always too busy to see me again.
Later, here in MN, I had the most beautiful girlfriend I ever had, from Lithuania. For some reason she had to go back to her country and planning to come back in three weeks. While she was there, some political crap happened in Lithuania that year. She couldn’t get out of there, and since I had student visa, (and poor, and didn’t speak Russian or Lithuanian), I couldn’t go…for what? To rescue her?, to marry her?
Well, I’m still here, laughing at my luck in the matters of love.
Thanks guys for your comment.
"A typical rule of online dating:
Chicks are fatter than they claim,
Guy are shorter."
****************************** **********
True, and since most of the gals only post their best shots from the chest up, and many times the face only, my rule is:
"puffy cheeks, puffy body"
Tried it one time... realized I do much better in person. Meeting people in person you at least know if you are atracted to them or not. I doubt I will ever try meeting people online again. Not that I would pass up an oportunity to meet someone I get along with and have common intrests with.. but I'm staying away from those dating boards [img]redface.gif[/img] . There are just way too many liers and drama queens.
Anyway onto my "horor story".
First of all, she used the outdated picture trick. Um about 40lbs-50lbs of fat heavier and 5? years older.. than her picture. Girls w/ a little bit of fat are fine to me. I like wide hiped women, and those body types usualy look a lite biger... but whoa that was way too much fat. 60lbs overweight is too much for me. The only reason I met her in person was because she was in the IT field too. I thought we had some common inrests. A worse part of this is.. I missed the Michigan, Notre Dame football game.. I had student tickets.. and thinking back I would have rather gone to the game [img]smile.gif[/img] . and I am not even that big a fan of football.
Originally posted by aztecwarrior: Thanks for the replay. I will share some of my horror stories. It’s time to get them out of my system!!!)
The gal from Chicago was short, super masculine and square. I don’t even want to describe how she was dressing when we met the first time at the airport, this would be too long, I just want to say, I was shocked and thought: "this is most expensive and ridiculous date I ever had". She looked like a wrestler, no kidding here. Worst, she was not interested in boys (yes, she was lesbiana -but an ugly one-) I replayed to her (on-line) because she stated; “I would like to start a family”. We talked over the phone for months. I never understood why she never told me the truth.
The one in CA, totally the opposite. In her profile she clamed “athletic” and “vegetarian” she was either. She was anorexic and raw food eater. She was short and very skinny; suffer from epilepsy (and many other illness) with two 11-year twin boys. They loved me and we get along just fine (the kids and I). Just picture this: these boys (very thin) have never taste milk, ice-cream, pizza, eggs, and any normal thing that a kids eat (healthy or unhealthy) they only eat raw organic crap. The kids would come to the house to eat during their break, had no friends and will do their homework in the floor with a flash light, or walk around the house with a flashlight, at night. (Because she was teaching them to save energy). I left that mad house 3 days before planned (no, I was not staying there while I was in CA).
Third: She came from KY and stay with me. I want her out next day. She stayed 5. It was horrible (she stayed in different room the whole time. She was HUGE!!!).
The last one, she came without a formal invitation (she even said that she couldn’t believe God put me in her path, I thought that was weird. She was “so in love with me” she couldn’t wait to meet me, got a hotel here and flew from D.C. It was bad…and sad, for her).
One gal (super beautiful gal from Peru) I met in Salt Lake City (I was attending the University of Utah at that time), while I was at her place and we were too busy not longer watching the movie, right in that moment before to human beings can get to close, she dared to asked me the question no one else asked me before: “And…what kind of visa do you have?” I couldn’t believe she asked that!!! (I’m even laughing as I type this!) I said, as I laid back and looked puzzled into her eyes: “Student visa, I told you I’m student at ‘the U”, I have F1 Visa”. After that, she was always too busy to see me again.
Later, here in MN, I had the most beautiful girlfriend I ever had, from Lithuania. For some reason she had to go back to her country and planning to come back in three weeks. While she was there, some political crap happened in Lithuania that year. She couldn’t get out of there, and since I had student visa, (and poor, and didn’t speak Russian or Lithuanian), I couldn’t go…for what? To rescue her?, to marry her?
Well, I’m still here, laughing at my luck in the matters of love.
Thanks guys for your comment.
Dear God, man! Turn off your computer and go to a bar!!!
That's the roughest bunch of stories from one dude I've heard in a while.
I hate to say it, but man, we sometimes set ourselves up for the same kind of defeat over and over again. Kinda like Deion Sanders: He could play baseball (sorta), but man he was so much better off when he decided to stick with football!
Drop this game and pick up another one!!! There are bars, clubs, school/work...!!! Just keep it in state to avoid the massive difficulties. I dunno... try anything else!
At the very least, if you're going to use online dating services, stick to ones in your neighbourhood. That way, you can meet over a beer or a coffee instead of wating 4 days and a lot of $$.
but if you meet people from your neighbourhood, there's a chance you'll run into them some other time. That could get awkward.
'Hey Russ, I thought you told me you were moving to Florida to be with your sick Aunt?'
'Um.. She got better [img]smile.gif[/img] '
That would also suck to spend that much money on flights, hotels etc. and then be disappointed though. That's exactly why I won't get into online dating, you never know what your getting. I like a good surprise, but the keyword in that sentence is good
__________________
And major action will certainly make you feel a bit uncomfortable, which is absolutely fine. You've gotta get excited about feeling uncomfortable, you've gotta love feeling slightly uncomfortable, because you know that you're stepping outside the boundaries that you used to create.
Zach Even-Esh
I've made some huge mistakes, but they were necessary, because without them I wouldn't have learned anything.
-Dave Tate
Originally posted by mAtThEw: but if you meet people from your neighbourhood, there's a chance you'll run into them some other time. That could get awkward.
'Hey Russ, I thought you told me you were moving to Florida to be with your sick Aunt?'
'Um.. She got better [img]smile.gif[/img] '
Shouldn't be a problem as long as you're honest. Also, it's probably best not to reveal real names until you're about to meet (use an anonymous e-mail account). If you decide not to meet, but have seen each other's photos, it's still quite possible, if not likely, that you wouldn't recognise each other if you were at the same bar, party, etc..
The gal from Chicago was short, super masculine and square. I don’t even want to describe how she was dressing when we met the first time at the airport, this would be too long, I just want to say, I was shocked and thought: "this is most expensive and ridiculous date I ever had". She looked like a wrestler, no kidding here. Worst, she was not interested in boys (yes, she was lesbiana -but an ugly one-) I replayed to her (on-line) because she stated; “I would like to start a family”. We talked over the phone for months. I never understood why she never told me the truth.
That sucks, I have no idea what to say about that. If I saw her at the airport, Id pretend like I didnt see and just go straight to the counter and get another ticket out of there.
Quote:
The one in CA, totally the opposite. In her profile she clamed “athletic” and “vegetarian” she was either. She was anorexic and raw food eater. She was short and very skinny; suffer from epilepsy (and many other illness) with two 11-year twin boys. They loved me and we get along just fine (the kids and I). Just picture this: these boys (very thin) have never taste milk, ice-cream, pizza, eggs, and any normal thing that a kids eat (healthy or unhealthy) they only eat raw organic crap. The kids would come to the house to eat during their break, had no friends and will do their homework in the floor with a flash light, or walk around the house with a flashlight, at night. (Because she was teaching them to save energy). I left that mad house 3 days before planned (no, I was not staying there while I was in CA).
This is why I dont take vegetarian chicks. Its all about looks and athleticism in the profile. If it aint there, neither am I.
Quote:
Third: She came from KY and stay with me. I want her out next day. She stayed 5. It was horrible (she stayed in different room the whole time. She was HUGE!!!).
The last one, she came without a formal invitation (she even said that she couldn’t believe God put me in her path, I thought that was weird. She was “so in love with me” she couldn’t wait to meet me, got a hotel here and flew from D.C. It was bad…and sad, for her).
I automatically axe the chicks who hold religion dearly in their profile because of wacko shit like that. Didnt she send a pic?
Quote:
One gal (super beautiful gal from Peru) I met in Salt Lake City (I was attending the University of Utah at that time), while I was at her place and we were too busy not longer watching the movie, right in that moment before to human beings can get to close, she dared to asked me the question no one else asked me before: “And…what kind of visa do you have?” I couldn’t believe she asked that!!! (I’m even laughing as I type this!) I said, as I laid back and looked puzzled into her eyes: “Student visa, I told you I’m student at ‘the U”, I have F1 Visa”. After that, she was always too busy to see me again.
I dont really understand this. Did she mean "what kind of credit card you have" or was she talking about a travel visa? I would think that shed be all over the American ass
Quote:
Later, here in MN, I had the most beautiful girlfriend I ever had, from Lithuania. For some reason she had to go back to her country and planning to come back in three weeks. While she was there, some political crap happened in Lithuania that year. She couldn’t get out of there, and since I had student visa, (and poor, and didn’t speak Russian or Lithuanian), I couldn’t go…for what? To rescue her?, to marry her?
Well, I’m still here, laughing at my luck in the matters of love.
Thanks guys for your comment.
Man you definately have the international aspect down [img]tongue.gif[/img] This one is a little tragic though.
Seriously what defunct dating service are you using, because it sucks royally.
Oh and one more thing, what do you say to these crazy ass women? Id be pissed if she showed me a pic that isnt remotely near how she looks. Or if she were a dike. Thats just messed up.
__________________
"The strongest steel goes through the hottest fires."-Anonymous
"When you begin to believe nothing is heavy, all weights become light." -Rossbow
"Just remember, somewhere there is a little Chinese girl warming up with your max."-Jim Convroy
"It's a round hole, dammit. Everyone fits."--Anonymous Mod at Strengthmill
My friends have tried internet dating with similar horror stories...it's not for me, though. I guess I'm just too sceptical and not willing to weed out all the horror stories in the hopes of a good one I'd much rather be home alone than on a bad date [img]smile.gif[/img]
However, I've tried speed dating and that was kinda fun. 20 5min dates. The guys rotated to different tables in this bar and we chatted for 5mins. At the end of the night you marked who you would like to communicate with as friend/date/business. If both of you mark yes, you get their email address. See, non-committal...my favorite [img]smile.gif[/img]
Oh here's my story
ok so I met this girl over the internet, not a dating service but a friend of a friend type thing. I've never seen her before but she seemed alright so I figured what the hell let's go for it. We met at a mall, her, her friend, me and my friend. She told me on the internet that she was 'average', which I took to mean not fit but not chubby. WRONG! Me and my friend tried pretending we weren't us but she called my name and we knew there was no getting out of it. But then we had an idea. Here's what we did: we said we had to go into this book store, which was actually a large building outside of the mall with three or four entrances to it. Me and my friend pretended not to agree on which doors to go in (stupid right? but keep reading) so I went in one and he went in the other. The two girls couldnt decide what to do so they sat out front talking. Me and my friend went through the entrance on the other side and left. I know it was mean, but we were young immature and pissed off. Anyway, moral of the story is to be upfront and honest with people. How did we learn this lesson? We ran into one of the girls again in a move theatre a few months later and it wasn't too great. Well, we didn't really run into her as much as we heard her yelling 'Steve your a jackass' from down the hallway. And that is why I will never meet girls over the internet again.
__________________
And major action will certainly make you feel a bit uncomfortable, which is absolutely fine. You've gotta get excited about feeling uncomfortable, you've gotta love feeling slightly uncomfortable, because you know that you're stepping outside the boundaries that you used to create.
Zach Even-Esh
I've made some huge mistakes, but they were necessary, because without them I wouldn't have learned anything.
-Dave Tate
Originally posted by mAtThEw: Oh here's my story
ok so I met this girl over the internet, not a dating service but a friend of a friend type thing. I've never seen her before but she seemed alright so I figured what the hell let's go for it. We met at a mall, her, her friend, me and my friend. She told me on the internet that she was 'average', which I took to mean not fit but not chubby. WRONG! Me and my friend tried pretending we weren't us but she called my name and we knew there was no getting out of it. But then we had an idea. Here's what we did: we said we had to go into this book store, which was actually a large building outside of the mall with three or four entrances to it. Me and my friend pretended not to agree on which doors to go in (stupid right? but keep reading) so I went in one and he went in the other. The two girls couldnt decide what to do so they sat out front talking. Me and my friend went through the entrance on the other side and left. I know it was mean, but we were young immature and pissed off. Anyway, moral of the story is to be upfront and honest with people. How did we learn this lesson? We ran into one of the girls again in a move theatre a few months later and it wasn't too great. Well, we didn't really run into her as much as we heard her yelling 'Steve your a jackass' from down the hallway. And that is why I will never meet girls over the internet again.
At least you learned your lesson. Even if you aren't going to want to date someone in the future, there's no good reason to make them feel unattractive. That's never a nice feeling, and it's even worse when you're a teen.
I met my wife online...back in the olden days when it was free [img]smile.gif[/img]
I used it as a bit of a fishing net...cast it out not looking for an online relationship but as a way to meet people that didn't go out to the ordinary scene. Usually had a date most every Fri. Sat. Sun. of some sort with someone...most of whom were freaks. I DID get to sleep with a girl that is now doing porn...and meet my wife. [img]smile.gif[/img]
You gotta keep in mind that most women are crazy to a point (at least as far as guy think is concerned) the younger the crazier. The crazy ones aren't limited to the online scene.
there's always your local female correctional institution. you can write to her as often as you want, you know exactly what hours she has phone/computer privileges (no drunken calls at midnight), you go to see her (not the other way around), and if the face behind the plexiglas isn't what you want, you can say "thank you for your time" and move on (no awkward encounters the next night). Plus she's probably pretty independent, more likely to in shape (ever try that Prison Workout?) and upon her release might actually want to share your bed with another woman just for old times sake.
I'd much rather be home alone than on a bad date [img]smile.gif[/img] 
Linear Mode
