My girlfriend is currently in Italy with school and since she was there, some guy from her class is trying to have sex with her (trying to seduce her, get her drunk,..). So what should I do with him?
It's up to her to make him stop, not you. Guys will be trying to have sex with your girlfriend, wife, sister, etc. forever. They handle it unless it's right in front of you.
It's not an issue of the guy. It's an issue of the girl. Either you trust her to take care of herself (and stay faithful), or you don't. Either way, the guy's just trying to get his.
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It's not that I don't trust, but she it's easy to influence when she's drunk (and she likes to drink). And that guy really doesn't take no for an answer. He just keeps on trying. Someone really has to step in before he stops (and tries again the next day).
Besides the guy knows me, I also sat in their class last year (I go to another school now), so it's also a sign of disrespect towards me, imo. He knows that me and my girlfriend have been together for more then a year so he should back off.
What if you hurt him seriously? Is that worth the hassle of an arrest and prosecution? It's not like he's assaulting her. You just said you don't trust her because she drinks too much. Are you going to try to beat up every guy who comes on to her? Sooner or later you will get hurt or you will get arrested.
If you can't trust her to make the right decision (for your relationship) even while she's close to passed out; then it's not him, it's the both of you.
good luck
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If you can't trust her to make the right decision (for your relationship) even while she's close to passed out; then it's not him, it's the both of you.
What kind of bullshit is that How is a girl that's nearly passed out gonna push a guy off? And it's not that that guy's gonna stop when he's that close. There are guys like that, you know.
With beating him up I mean fighting and prevailing, not beaten him while he's down and all. And it's not like I'm gonna get arrested or something. I would probably just get kicked out for fighting (talking about fighting a club or something).
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I don't see why you have to be violent. You're a freaking championship mofo lifter. Just puff out your chest, look him in the eye and tell him politely but extremely firmly to back off. Unless he's an idiot, he'll get the message and comply.
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It's not that I don't trust, but she it's easy to influence when she's drunk (and she likes to drink).
It is her issue, isn't it? She is her own person - you don't own her. If she makes bad decisions when drunk then a) she shouldn't get drunk or b) she lives with bad decisions.
this is not the same as if you see someone being assaulted and in need of protection - then it is about the one being assaulted. This sounds like it is about you and your ego and your "ownership" of her - what if she wasn't drunk and made the decision perfectly sober?.
I don't see why you have to be violent. You're a freaking championship mofo lifter. Just puff out your chest, look him in the eye and tell him politely but extremely firmly to back off. Unless he's an idiot, he'll get the message and comply.
you know that works with most guys, but this guy just forgets about that stuff rather easily. He was afraid of me when I sat in his class, he was afraid of me when I won my first competition and so on, but after a while he just thinks it's not that special anymore. I just need to get through to him that he has to leave my girlfiriend alone.
I'm not affraid that he might succeed (well maybe a little), I'm just pissed that he doesn't stop even when I told him to back off.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LisaS
what if she wasn't drunk and made the decision perfectly sober?.
Then the same thing would happen, I'd just be a lot more mad at her
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"Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you are right." - Henry Ford
"UNLESS someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not." - Dr. Seuss
"Life is no brief candle to me. It is sort of a splendid torch which I have got hold of for a moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations." - George Bernard Shaw
If he is continually raping her, yes kick his ass. If she asks you to tell him to leave her alone, then do so. If she truly wanted him to stop, she could make it happen; otherwise it isn't beyond belief for any of us that she might kinda like the attention he is giving her.
Now, that's where you're wrong..
everyone knows how he's like, but he just DOESN't stop.
We call that RAPE in our country. If she decides to drink and get drunk while he's around, she's virtually asking for something to happen. I'm pretty sure she's playing with you...telling you all this stuff, and continuing to invite the situation. She wants you to act like you care and coming running to her "rescue" so that she can feel important while two boys fight over her. It's a game and you have to decide whether or not you want to play.
Now, that's where you're wrong..
everyone knows how he's like, but he just DOESN't stop.
I find that hard to believe. If she very loudly says "Look asshole I told you to leave me alone. I'm not interested in any way shape or form. Now take a friggin hike before I sack you!" he will take off. You really think if she humilates him in public that he is going to keep bothering her? No way he will. I agree with Lisa. You don't own her and looks like you don't trust her. I don't care how drunk you get, you don't cheat and if you do then the relationship wasn't strong enough. That is an issue that leaves both of you at fault, not dig me joe's! If he doesn't stop when she firmly asks him maybe she should think about hitting him with a sexual harassment complaint.
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So, the problem seems to be that you have a girlfriend that lets herself get drunk to the point where she's vulnerable. Isn't that an issue for you?
Well, we always go out together so when she's drunk, I'm probably too or will be later on. And she knows that I don't like it when she drinks a lot when I'm not around so she doesn't (as far as I know). But one time she said that she would probably have sex with him one day so he would just stop it. She probably didn't mean when she still together with me but it worries me.
If she truly wanted him to stop, she could make it happen; otherwise it isn't beyond belief for any of us that she might kinda like the attention he is giving her.
Quote:
Originally Posted by RedWifey
I'm pretty sure she's playing with you...telling you all this stuff, and continuing to invite the situation. She wants you to act like you care and coming running to her "rescue" so that she can feel important while two boys fight over her. It's a game and you have to decide whether or not you want to play.
By the way, they don't have sex. If they did I would have been looking for a new girlfriend already. I have a zero tolerance policy about cheating.
Also, she has already humilated him in public (not like that though) and he just got angry and agressive (things like punching her pretty hard on the arm or something)
Besides, she doesn't want me to 'protect' her. She wants to take care of things like that herself. Even with the punching. She's that not a girl girl type.
Also, she has already humilated him in public (not like that though) and he just got angry and agressive (things like punching her pretty hard on the arm or something)
Besides, she doesn't want me to 'protect' her. She wants to take care of things like that herself. Even with the punching. She's that not a girl girl type.
then what are you asking here?
Quote:
Originally Posted by igunick
My girlfriend is currently in Italy with school and since she was there, some guy from her class is trying to have sex with her (trying to seduce her, get her drunk,..). So what should I do with him?
are you going to "do something" to him even though she she's made it clear to you that she wants to handle it herself? Or, do you think he is dangerous enough that she could be out of her depth (as with the punching response) and get into real trouble - or is he just a persistant annoying SOB?
are you going to "do something" to him even though she she's made it clear to you that she wants to handle it herself? Or, do you think he is dangerous enough that she could be out of her depth (as with the punching response) and get into real trouble - or is he just a persistant annoying SOB?
Obviously her approach doesn't get through to him. Mine might...
And yes he's a persistant annoying SOB.
What would you do?
How is a girl that's nearly passed out gonna push a guy off? And it's not that that guy's gonna stop when he's that close. There are guys like that, you know. 
:p
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