Paul McCartney/Heather Mills Pun

Howard_Rourke · 05-18-2006, 11:41 AM

I don't know if Roger Friedman from Fox 411 intended this pun or not, but anyone with any knowledge of Heather Mills couldn't miss it.

"At this year’s Grammys — where McCartney had his first album nomination since 1975 — Heather was nowhere to be found. And that should have been the indication right off that trouble was afoot."

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,195970,00.html

drs · 05-18-2006, 12:25 PM

Funny.

I wouldn't have known that she was an amputee if it weren't for the news this morning.

Irishdazza · 05-19-2006, 04:15 AM

After the recent near tragedy in NZ another Gold miner was involved in an accident which resulted in an amputation. He was quite distressed and was heard to comment "I'm finished! Who wants a one legged gold digger!?!?".

He was told there may be an opening with Paul McCartney...

Alextown · 05-19-2006, 05:13 AM

I heard Friedman wanted to use something else there, but he was stumped.

Irishdazza · 05-19-2006, 09:30 AM

Just got this in an email...

News reports have confirmed that Paul McCartney has separated from his
wife Heather Mills- McCartney.

Mrs Mills- McCartney is said to be distraught over the split "He has
been my crutch for so long!!" She said in an earlier briefing, "I have
no idea why this has happened, I'm stumped"

She's reported to be making frantic efforts to keep the split as civil
as possible.

"She's 'Running around in circles", according to a close friend, "she
will need all the support she can get its not like its easy to walk out
on a relationship like this"

It is not known whether a pre-nuptial agreement was signed prior to the
marriage, Paul McCartney is one of the richest men in the world amassing
a colossal wealth due to his participation with The Beatles and
subsequent musical collaborations, if an agreement hasn't been signed it
is believed that she won't have a leg to stand on.

Rumours abound over the split have suggested that infidelity may have
been the cause. "She's terrible" a source stated, "always trying to get
her leg over".

Another source has suggested that her battle with alcoholism was the
cause. "Macca couldn't handle it anymore" a friend said "he would get
home at night and find her legless"

Many have attributed this to a problem which started with the present
that Paul had got her for the wedding, she heard he was getting her a
plane. It all became clear when she opened her first present and it was
a Ladyshave it was not the type of plane she was expecting.

jax · 05-19-2006, 09:49 AM

too bad about the divorce.... isn't he just about to turn 64? at least he can start smoking the wacky weed again.

Alextown · 05-19-2006, 11:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Irishdazza

Just got this in an email...

News reports have confirmed that Paul McCartney has separated from his
wife Heather Mills- McCartney.

Mrs Mills- McCartney is said to be distraught over the split "He has
been my crutch for so long!!" She said in an earlier briefing, "I have
no idea why this has happened, I'm stumped"

She's reported to be making frantic efforts to keep the split as civil
as possible.

"She's 'Running around in circles", according to a close friend, "she
will need all the support she can get its not like its easy to walk out
on a relationship like this"

It is not known whether a pre-nuptial agreement was signed prior to the
marriage, Paul McCartney is one of the richest men in the world amassing
a colossal wealth due to his participation with The Beatles and
subsequent musical collaborations, if an agreement hasn't been signed it
is believed that she won't have a leg to stand on.

Rumours abound over the split have suggested that infidelity may have
been the cause. "She's terrible" a source stated, "always trying to get
her leg over".

Another source has suggested that her battle with alcoholism was the
cause. "Macca couldn't handle it anymore" a friend said "he would get
home at night and find her legless"

Many have attributed this to a problem which started with the present
that Paul had got her for the wedding, she heard he was getting her a
plane. It all became clear when she opened her first present and it was
a Ladyshave it was not the type of plane she was expecting.

lol, you win :p