The members of the clubhouse were in the adjacent room in the suite having a heck of a time.
I went to put my drink down on the floor-I was not drunk, I just always act goofy-, and I must not have set it on the carpet correctly, or on top of something (I think my camera), and it tipped over and spilled.
During the course of the spill, we were talking about you. We were having a grand old time sharing stories and cracking jokes.
I darted off into the bathroom to grab a towel to soak up my spillage. As I entered the bathroom, I was told not to think about you and your so and so. (You should feel honored.) I responded that I did in fact have to go to the bathroom. So, as nature is calling and I have the door closed, I am constantly reminded about you and your so and so. As I reach down to flush the toilet, my Viagra pen which I had received earlier in the evening, fell out of my pocket and into the toilet. And, yes, you should already have realized that I did in fact reach in and pull it out.
I rinsed off the pen (and my hands), and proceeded back into the room to the laughter of everyone else to clean up the spill. About that time, FlyinM had mentioned "Spooge." Now spooge is not a word we hear every day, so we are rolling around laughing about spooge, and naturally, I have the towel and just left the bathroom. Do the math.
So the spill is cleaned up, no problem. The members of the Clubhouse ordered t-shirts (what goes on in the clubhouse stays in the clubhouse and if talk of the clubhouse offends you, I am sorry. I'm sure you're in a secret society too and don't want me in there with you.) because most of us would be meeting in Little Rock, and I organized the t-shirt making. I was forced to pay $16 extra to ensure that the t-shirts would arrive in Arkansas in time, and I did not bill that into their payments. So everyone else whips out their wallets to reimburse me for their share of the shipping. as I collect the money, I am being paid in all ones, I realize the little double entendre going on.
After a pause, everyone else realizes it too, and we are again in uproarious laughter. (We were told to quiet down by an adjacent room. As the attendees know, I do not have a volume control, unless loud, louder and loudest counts.) I then proceed to stuff dollar bills in parts of my clothing to pose for pictures. (also, if you haven't noticed, which you should have because we were talking about you and a spooge towel in the same sentence, I am a camera hog.) A sequence of events unfolds, and I eventually have my back to the group after I remove the money, and I am zipping and buttoning my jeans.
At that same time JP walks into the room to give his goodbye. The man had not slept and was a little "under the influence" and needed to get back to home. However, he had the (un)fortunate circumstances of walking into the room at the same exact time that I am adjusting my pants. He then gives a big "WHAT THE!" and walks back out.
He eventually gets the courage to come back in, and we explain what had just happened with the spooge towel. He then has the balls (pun intended) to shake my hand and give me a manhug only after I assure him that my hands were clean.
Once again, I started the downward decent of yet another conversation.
__________________
Those that can't do teach. Those that can't teach consult. Deserve aka Gabe
'8 replies before the gutter! Good job Clubhouse!!!!!' Ninjabookey
Rest and relaxation can be a powerful “nothing” to propel us to greater achievements. Mahler
Note to humans: when the Anthem is sung, one is to remove one's hat/helmet, stand still and at attention facing the flag (or the music, if you can't see the flag), and SHUT UP! KTHXBAI FisrCutb8
Sorry Nick, but this telling does not do the story justice. It was, I'm afraid, a truly "you had to be there moment". One of the funniest 30 minutes of my life ... seriously. Proven by Buk spewing not one but two mouths of his drink onto the floor from laughing so hard. My sides still hurt! You da man, Nick - a true original!
__________________
"Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you are right." - Henry Ford
"UNLESS someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not." - Dr. Seuss
"Life is no brief candle to me. It is sort of a splendid torch which I have got hold of for a moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations." - George Bernard Shaw
Is it just me, or does this story read like a passage from Miller's "Tropic of Cancer"?
Couple of questions. Who is "you" in this story. I.e., " was told not to think about you and your so and so."
Also, how was the Viagra pen obtained, and in what context?
Anyhow, it certainly sounds like things got a little crazier than last year's Peej party :-)
You is a certain someone that shall remain nameless. I used "you" because, well, it could be you. The so and so is a part of your body.
The viagra pen was obtained rather inauspiciously. Tiffany, Hagana Gordon's wife (no his first name is not Hagana) was handing them out and I was insistent on getting one. However, I left it on the bathroom sink.
Sorry Nick, but this telling does not do the story justice. It was, I'm afraid, a truly "you had to be there moment". One of the funniest 30 minutes of my life ... seriously. Proven by Buk spewing not one but two mouths of his drink onto the floor from laughing so hard. My sides still hurt! You da man, Nick - a true original!
You're completely right. It doesn't. I tried to make it as funny as possible, and it was, but not nearly as sidesplitting as it was.
You is a certain someone that shall remain nameless. I used "you" because, well, it could be you. The so and so is a part of your body.
The viagra pen was obtained rather inauspiciously. Tiffany, Hagana Gordon's wife (no his first name is not Hagana) was handing them out and I was insistent on getting one. However, I left it on the bathroom sink.
This story keeps getting more and more complex. It's like unpeeling an onion :p
This story keeps getting more and more complex. It's like unpeeling an onion :p
No kidding. Soon everybody will have tears in their eyes.
__________________
Those that can't do teach. Those that can't teach consult. Deserve aka Gabe
'8 replies before the gutter! Good job Clubhouse!!!!!' Ninjabookey
Rest and relaxation can be a powerful “nothing” to propel us to greater achievements. Mahler
Note to humans: when the Anthem is sung, one is to remove one's hat/helmet, stand still and at attention facing the flag (or the music, if you can't see the flag), and SHUT UP! KTHXBAI FisrCutb8
The story of the spooge towel (Summit 2006)
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