JP Fitness Forum Comes Through Again!

[Blackjack]

It's been about a year since I joined this forum and my experience this morning that I'm sharing is quite ironic. Now, I don't post all that much as you can see from my post count. I read about fitness here and other places a lot, maybe too much, and post when I feel I have something to add or have a nagging question. I will say that I've learned an awful lot from reading the posts on this forum.

This morning, I had a little trouble getting out of bed. Nothing unusual when you get up at 5am to workout, but it lasted until I got ready to workout. This usually doesn't happen. Was feeling pretty tired a littly nauceous (sp?) and had a headache for some reason. Went through a general warmup and still didn't feel that good. So I decided my body was telling me to maybe take it easy today. Things just aren't there for one reason or another, it happens. I shut the light off in the gym and went out to sit on the couch and turned the TV on. Then it happened...

First thing that pops in my head - ya know Mahler hasn't missed a workout in years 4 or 5 if I'm not mistaken. BASTARD!!!

I've never met John, I've read many posts by him. Never communicated with him or anyone else from this site via pm or email. Technically, I don't know them. But I know that fact. He only posts when he has something to add. Many times, just a word of encouragement, or a short constructive tip or simply motivation. I didn't want to let him down. So I got back up and did the workout that I had planned. Maybe not to the intensity level I'm used to, but pretty damn good. (Lower body workout to make matters worse.)

So this is nothing new around here - but maybe someone new will read this and wonder what all the hub-bub is about. It works - we do encourage and drive one another - probably not as effective as an actual workout partner - but a close second.

So, thanks to all for you help, knowledge, support & encouragement.

Sincerely,

Ted

[Bond007]

Man, now that's a motivational story bro! I like it! And, Mahler will be touched and probably get all sappy on ya, but oh well! He's still a good guy!!

You do have a point, though. Sometimes a "virtual" workout partner can be better than the real thing!

[TrainingGirl]

Nice post Ted. I feel the same way. I probably would have given up a long time ago if it weren't for you guys. The support and encouragement that comes from this board is unmatched anywhere.

[K-Court]

Excellent motivational tale, Ted. Thanks for sharing. I too have had many experiences where one of the board members is hovering over me telling me to get my a$$ in gear. We really are like Mahler's Locker Room, aren't we?

[Chris Correia]

Mahler's a showoff!

I will never admit as to whether he inspires me or not. There are too many other saps (oops! ) helping John's head swell.

Actually, it's his heart that swells.

Nice post, Jack. Hey, you're almost a neighbor!

[BFG]

is Mahler a Net Nanny then makin sure we all peform????? sounds cool must admit you guys are driving me to the next level too as I dont wanna come on here and post up a shite workout or heaven forbid a missed one!!!!!!!!

[Ruma]

Awesome Ted

[FishrCutB8]

I hear what you're saying. It's why I come here, especially when I'm feeling low. I love this place for the motivation...

The only person as dedicated as Mahler was that Temp-Mahler cat. They had the same routine, the same goals, the same drive...they even shared the same writing style. It's like they're twins or something...).

[K-Court]

Evil twin, I think, Fish.

[FlyinM]

Great job Ted. If you have Mahler in your head, you ought to go over and read his training log.

Not to give away his secrets, but here is an exchange from his log:

---

Quote:


Of course, you realize I just sit here eating nachos and cheese and make this stuff up.

Of course he's just kidding..... He's been the motivator here a long time and he does know how to put his thoughts into words. He'll really like your story.

[Mahler]

Well, you got one thing right, Blackjack.
I AM a bastard.

Thanks for the post, but most of all thanks for getting back in that gym.
And, that growth you have on your neck in your avatar is the best reason for getting in the gym and staying fit. Makes it worth the effort.

And the rest of you guys and gals? Well, you don't want me to get all sappy now, do you?

[ODB]

Originally Posted by FishrCutB8

I hear what you're saying. It's why I come here, especially when I'm feeling low. I love this place for the motivation...

The only person as dedicated as Mahler was that Temp-Mahler cat. They had the same routine, the same goals, the same drive...they even shared the same writing style. It's like they're twins or something...).

What are you talking about Fish? That Temp-Mahler tried to keep up but totally wussed out. He doesn't even post anymore. I think Mahler didn't like someone copying him so much and went over and kicked his ass!

(speaking of tough guys I read somewhere the other day that Chuck Norris doesn't have a normal chin under his beard, he just has another fist.)

[Blackjack]

Stole this from T-Nation and thought it was applicable...

Today's tip comes from Dave Tate:
Defining Moments
"We all have those times in life I like to call "defining moments." These moments in time can be glorious or disastrous, but always shape the direction and path of who we become. We grow and become better or worse for it. The difference between better or worse is how the situation is perceived. If something bad happens to you, do you view it as a learning experience and move on, or do you let it tear you up? If something good happens, do you look back to ask why or write it off as luck? What does all this have to do with strength training? Everything!"

[FishrCutB8]

--Mahler once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
--Some people like to eat frogs' legs. Mahler likes to eat lizard legs. Hence, snakes.
--There are no races, only countries of people Mahler has beaten to different shades of black and blue.
--When Mahler was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he punched the store so hard it became a Wendy's.
--Mahler can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.
--A Mahler-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.
--When Mahler falls in water, Mahler doesn't get wet. Water gets Mahler.
--Mahler’s house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
--Mahler doesn't actually write posts, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
--In honor of Mahler, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Mahlersized.
--Mahler CAN believe it's not butter.
--If tapped, a Mahler squat could power the country of Australia for 44 minutes.
--Mahler can divide by zero.
--Scientists have estimated that the energy given off during the Big Bang is roughly equal to 1MRHK (Mahler Roundhouse Kick)
--The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Mahler has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood, sweat and tears.
--A picture is worth a thousand words. A Mahler is worth 1 billion words.
--Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Mahler Deadlift.
--Mahler invented his own type of karate. It's called Mahler-Will-Kill.
--When Mahler posed for his avatar picture, the French surrendered to Mahler just to be on the safe side.
--While urinating, Mahler is easily capable of welding titanium.
--Mahler once sued the Houghton-Mifflin textbook company when it became apparent that their account of the war of 1812 was plagiarized from his autobiography.
--When Mahler talks, everybody listens. And dies.
--When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When Mahler kills a ninja, he uses every part.
--Contrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Mahler to go around.
--Mahler doesnt shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Mahler is Mahler.
--For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Mahler, each testicle is larger than the other one.
--Mahler always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego.
--When taking the SAT, write "Mahler" for every answer. You will score over 8000.
--Mahler invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.
--When you're Mahler, anything + anything is equal to 1. One kick to the head.
--Mahler has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
--On his birthday, Mahler randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.
--Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee. Except Mahler.
--Mahler doesn't throw up if he drinks too much. Mahler throws down!
--In the beginning there was nothing...then Mahler Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.
--Mahler has 12 moons. One of those moons is the Earth.
--Mahler grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
--Archeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Mahler"
--Mahler ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
--Mahler and Lou walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
--If you Google search "Mahler getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen.
--Mahler can drink an entire gallon of milk in thirty-seven seconds.
--Little known medical fact: Mahler invented the Caesarean section when he kicked his way out of his mother's womb.
--Mahler doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.
--The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Mahler. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.

[Bond007]

OMG! Fish that is fricking hilarious!!!

[TrainingGirl]

I think Fish's post needs to be made a sticky

[RacerBill]

Originally Posted by FishrCutB8

--When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When Mahler kills a ninja, he uses every part.

Uh oh. I think that's why no one's seen Nick lately...



BTW Fish, that was friggin' hysterical.

[Iamjennmedic]

HAHA Fish thats so funny

[BFG]

ha ha fish, someones been using the find and replace function on the chuck norris thread but funny all the same

my fav is:
--Mahler and Lou walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.

[Blackjack]

Hey Fish...thanks for turning was suppose to be a heart-felt and serious thread into a fuckin' joke. Appreciate that. Must be nice to have that much time on your hands.

[Mahler]

Mahler is amused.

Well, mildly amused.

Actually, somewhat amused.


Okay, lets just say he shit his pants laughing.

[K-Court]

Originally Posted by Blackjack

Hey Fish...thanks for turning was suppose to be a heart-felt and serious thread into a fuckin' joke. Appreciate that. Must be nice to have that much time on your hands.

Hmmmm, no emoticons .....

[ninja]

Originally Posted by Blackjack

Hey Fish...thanks for turning was suppose to be a heart-felt and serious thread into a fuckin' joke. Appreciate that. Must be nice to have that much time on your hands.

Yeah.... I second K-Court's comment......... am I not getting something here?

And we will be refuting the Mahler killing Ninja line at the retreat.

EDIT: Could it be an April Fools' joke?