Hello all, my name is Marney, and I am new. I'm 35, mom of two, married and a writer.
I confess, I am a weight loss plan junkie. If they told me it wasn't a diet, it was a lifestyle change, I TOTALLY ate it up.
For the past several months, I have been putting my body though a rigorous "cardio" program several days a week, with little if any strength training, and when I did, it was with the mentioned pink Barbie weights. I even ran a 10K two days after I sprained my ankle, becuase I was determined to burn off that specific amount of calories.
I joined my latest program in August 2007, dropped 25 pounds in four months, thought I was one smokin hot MILF... only to gain back 25 plus 10 more since then. The realization that part of my weight loss was muscle loss is pretty disheartening.
So, to get to my actual question.... how do you change your mindset? I mean honestly, the fact that I am sitting here when I could be doing one of dozens of cardio videos currently sitting in my TV cabinet is difficult. The idea that I need to EAT lunch rather than snack on a some lettuce leaves and cucumbers (no ponts!) is hard to accept.
If anyone out there had to make this drasitc change in mindset, how did you do it?
Also, I am having a hard time, since programs literally focus non-stop on your actual WEIGHT. I have no idea what a goal WEIGHT should be. To combat this issue, I threw out my scale this morning. But it's not like that won't stop me from hopping on the scale at the gym. I know I need to gain muscle and lose fat, but I don't know what that calculates out to in actual weight. I think I also know that I shouldn't focus on that right now, on day one, but like the low calorie restircted diet and non-stop cardio, it's a hard habit to break.
First of all, read NROL4W and really digest how important nutrition is to your body. You must eat. You must eat to support your training and you must eat if you plan to gain any LBM.
Next, measure yourself. You don't need to track via a scale. Take pictures and measure yourself regularly. Or use a pair of jeans that are too tight as a goal. Those things will tell you more than a scale anyway.
Next, re-read the chapter called "Step away from the treadmill".
Next, get a food scale and start tracking your food in GRAMS. Weigh it all and track it somewhere like Fitday or Sparkpeople. Do it for a couple weeks religiously. Did you lost weight? Congrats -- you have found a nice deficit in which to lose some fat. Did you gain weight? You now know what over maintenance calories look like. Did you stay the same? You discovered maintenance. Adjust accordingly.
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You don't have to change your mindset overnight. Just change the behaviors for now. The old "fake it until you make it" actually works pretty well to get you going.
When it does come to changing your mind though I think you just have to read. If you read enough about weight training and eating properly and the importance of protein and good fats your mind will start to come to those same positions.
I am suprised how easy this book is to read. I confess, in the past, any nutritional or health book I got, all I did was skim though and search for the food/exercise portion.
I just bought this book a few days ago and it's full of earmarks and notes already. I am really enjoying it, and it's pretty eye-opening.
I've heard only BAD things about sparkpeople, but that was from people who were trying to use that rather than count their points, and it was more complicated than they cared to work at. Thanks for the suggestion!
I am pretty excited to try some new recipes as well. My husband and I had a session with a personal trainer yesterday, but I have to say, the cost per week is too much (we are paying for the gym membership though, and we'll look at the finances again in a few months, but at this time, we'd have to sell one of the kids to pay for it).
What do you think of personal trainers. I've heard only really really good or really really bad things. How do you know how to PICK one? Or if s/he's really good at her/his job, or a total meathead?
ps... I promise not to bog the boards down with stupid questions, I am just excited to get going on this program.
There are lots of good trainers....just not at my gym. Seriously, there's 100x more good info right here on this forum than could ever be found at my gym. I think that more the rule, too, rather than the exception, unfortunately.
I would suggest using the search function here and looking up different threads on the different movements, watching videos, really learning proper form. A great book to get is Mark Rippetoe's Starting Strength, as well as the video.
You could spend a ton of time right here on the forum and learn a whole heck of a lot. Also, check out the FAQ stickied at the top of this forum for any questions you might have specific to NROL4W.
honestly, there aren't many decent/worth-the-price trainers at my gym either. I can't say I'd pay the money even if there were though, because I've got an awesome program with NROLFW and because I go with my husband who's also into lifting. Instant spotter! Really read the book, don't just skim it and then make sure to look up the proper form for each exercise - both in the book and on the forums. I also recommend www.stumptuous.com. Once you both know what to do, then you can each watch each other for form. Once you get form down pat, then you don't really need a spotter (although it's nice working out with your sweetie, just don't call him that at the gym - the bros will tease him).
I also wanted to say that I whole-heartedly agree with the previous posters about the weight mind-set thing. Don't even weigh yourself at the gym! You may gain pounds as you gain muscle but just keep trying on the tight clothes every once and awhile and you'll see changes. And remember you gotta eat, esp. the protein - fuel the machine!!!! *flexes muscles*
Thanks everyone. I don't mean to totally geek out, but I am super excited.
I hate the points counting program I was on (can you guess what it was??). I cannot tell you how many times I AVOIDED throwing chicken or tuna in my lunch or dinner salad (and just ate lettuce and a few veggies) simply because I didn't want to use up the 3 points. Same with milk. I never drank more than 2 glasses a day to save points, even though I love milk and would like 3 glasses a day. And eventually, come weekend time, I would be so hungry I would eat everything in sight and end up at the exact same weight at weigh-in. Just last week, I pushed myself to run for 50 minutes, then fast walk for 30 more, just so I could eat something. That was pretty much the exact moment I realized something was terribly wrong with my plan.
When I brought it up with some of my friends on the program, they all told me that it was "impossible" for me to excercise wrong, that as long as I was moving, I was doing it right. While that seemed LOGICAL, it certianly did not seem RIGHT.
The trainer we spoke to was really pushing it (obviously, that's his job) even though we kept saying no. He kept saying we had to invest in our health, and we kept saying, "we did, we joined the gym." I also bought this great book!
As far as working with my husband, he actually answers me when I call him Pookie Bear. In fact, once my 7 year old called him Pookie Bear, and he answered HIM. I will try not to do that to him in the gym.
You change your mindset a little at a time. When your diet is dialed in, and your gym time and workouts are firmly incorporated incorporated into your routine, and you have lived this way for maybe a year or so, THEN I would say it is no longer a mindset, it's a lifestyle.
And don't set unrealistic goals for yourself, as you are just starting out. I did that, and I became very discouraged and depressed, because they were impossible to achieve. Everybody has plateaus, everybody stumbles. Just think of your progress in baby steps, and keep you eyes on your (realistic) goal, while you enjoy the journey.
I've heard only BAD things about sparkpeople, but that was from people who were trying to use that rather than count their points, and it was more complicated than they cared to work at. Thanks for the suggestion!
SparkPeople is crap for tracking Points, but pretty easy to use once you set it up - a bunch of us are over there for tracking food & macronutrient balance. The key to remember (and it was in someone's log recently) is to adjust the "target" values so that they match what you're actually trying to eat, rather than what Spark thinks you should be eating.
I'm with everyone else, the mind-set change (and I'm working on it too, believe me!) will come when it comes. Don't worry much about it, just enjoy getting stronger.
Hi Marney. I will add that I used a personal trainer when I had about one year of lifting under my belt. That year was pretty much using the machines randomly, at whim when I was in the gym. I did gain muscle, but that is because I was totally new at weightlifting. Newbies can gain muscle quickly no matter what type of lifting they are doing, as long as it's challenging weights, not barbies. After the year, I plateaued and got a trainer. She was useful for me because she taught me some things I hadn't learned by osmosis on my own, and got me using more free weights (but not enough). Also helps to have the motivator there forcing you to do it when you'd rather stop and puke and quit!
But. . . . .and it's a big but. . .I have learned more USEFUL information here on the forum, and in the NROLFW book than I ever learned from the trainer. If you read until you really understand what and why you are doing, and read the threads that talk about how to properly do the exercises, watch the videos linked here everywhere, and practice in the real gym, you will know more and do better than you will do in years of working with a trainer. Spend any money you can spare on the good books and videos recommended on jpfitness, and don't throw it down the garbage can of personal training.
Definitely, definitely, use Fitday or Sparkpeople, or any tracking program to track diet. You also might consider the GowearFit to track your burn. Check out the thread on that: GowearFit Thread. Not everyone thinks it's worth the money, but I like mine a lot, I learned a lot about how much I actually burn in a day.
NROL4W newbie, first workout tonight
Linear Mode
