Zach - not in VA, but maybe my jerk had a brother at your gym?
I was curious when I posted if others had similar experiences... I still believe that SOME men will use their size to bully or intimidate a smaller woman (or man). Yes, this guy was a jerk in general (lousy gym etiquette and lousy form too!) - no debate on that. Hope he slams his db's down hard again - onto his own foot!
I am lucky - as I think I mentioned, it's my home-turf, my gym that I've gone to since the day it opened, and I'm much better-known there than he is. Had I felt the need, the staff would've helped me out and stepped in. I don't know that I'd feel as secure if I were in a gym where I didn't know anyone else...
But, to paraphrase many of the prior posters - poop happens. I can get stronger and fitter, but he'll always be a jerk.
Zach - not in VA, but maybe my jerk had a brother at your gym?
I was curious when I posted if others had similar experiences... I still believe that SOME men will use their size to bully or intimidate a smaller woman (or man). Yes, this guy was a jerk in general (lousy gym etiquette and lousy form too!) - no debate on that. Hope he slams his db's down hard again - onto his own foot!
I am lucky - as I think I mentioned, it's my home-turf, my gym that I've gone to since the day it opened, and I'm much better-known there than he is. Had I felt the need, the staff would've helped me out and stepped in. I don't know that I'd feel as secure if I were in a gym where I didn't know anyone else...
But, to paraphrase many of the prior posters - poop happens. I can get stronger and fitter, but he'll always be a jerk.
yes, I've had very similar experiences at my gym and I also believe that for some men it is a gender issue, they try and bully me because I'm a woman. Some of this behavior does have to do with people not knowing gym etiquette, but not all.
For example, I had some alternating set up, right next to 3 other men who had their own alternating set ups, and a man approached me from across the gym to tell me I was hogging things. He didn't even want to use my equipment, he just wanted to let ME know. He became invisible to me at that point and I put my headphones back in and ignored him. One of the other men spoke up and asked if he had a problem with HIS set up, and the man turned red and left the area. We all just shook our heads.
Just two weeks ago I left my towel and water by the lat pulldown machine. not on the chair, but on the side of the machine. A guy who was on the machine next to me told me that I was a b**ch for leaving my towel there. I told him that "if he would worry more about what HE was doing in the gym, he'd be able to lat pulldown more than 50 pounds. Watch this and tell me who's the b**ch." I proceeded to pull down 80 lbs., heh heh. He got up and left. Bastid!
My gym has a more health club type of setting, with people who have no idea what they are doing who go in there and lift a couple of pounds, do this and that, after their raquetball session. Now I go to the gym during non-peak hours and have learned when the weightlifters and fitness competitors go. I've found other NROL kindred spirits who work out during this time and haven't had a run-in with an a**hole since.
LOL Starfish! I wanted to say something like that to the guys who were screwing around on the lat pulldown (supposedly working in between my sets, but they were screwing around more than actually working) this weekend. Of course, when I noticed that they had to move the weight down to 70lbs (from the 120 I was pulling), I felt vindicated and just left well enough alone. lol
From a sheer percentage standpoint, women are likely to run into this stuff more because they seem more likely to do non "bro" lifting activities than guys. Only a small percentage of guys is doing step ups and lunges. A much larger percentage on the women's side.
Ahh Crap, so now I am less of a Bro because I do step ups and lunges on benches!
I agree I think the guy was just an ass. To be honest I get odd looks and some of the meat heads mad at me while I am doing BSS and Step ups. They have the opinion that I should not be there doing "those" exercises in the weight room. All the while I know for a fact they would die from a stroke if they had to do 3x15 with no rest.
Good for you for standing up. No one should put up with that kind of rudeness.
It's quite nice when it's really crowded... I can go in there and use THOSE free weights. There are no barbells in there, though. Just a few cable machines, other machines which I never use, but a full dumbell rack. And more floor space for work with the ball, bosu, or whatever.
Last edited by sharsell119 : 04-09-2008 at 02:36 PM.
Reason: typo!
In the three years I've been going to the Y I've only had one run-in with someone in the weight room. The first time was when some guy yelled at me for unloading the leg press machine because he was still using it - I guess his definition of "using" the machine was spending 5 minutes talking to his buddies at the other end of the weight room while doing the occasional pull-up. The guy often pulls this crap with other people though, so I just attributed it to the fact that he's a douche.
My gym actually has a small "womens only" area. Is that unusual, or do many of you have those too at your gym?
I've seen those occasionally... my concerns are:
1) Usually not well-equipped for "real" lifting (at least the ones I've seen)
2) I would not like it if there was a men-only area!
On the other hand (I like to see all sides if possible), it would probably feel safer for a newbie woman lifter...
Only a couple of times has anyone ever taken off any of my weights from what i was using, or questioned weird things i do (and i use bands/chains/boards all the time.).
But I train with my girlfriend who does the same kind of thing, and people are always stealing her weights, telling her what she is doing is wrong etc.
Luckily now, we train at a powerlifting gym. ammonia, chalkWpuke buckets, harcore porn on the walls, and the loudest thrash metal playing 24/7. When i first took her there, she wanted to leave, immediatley. Now, with how much support the other lifters give, i doubt shell ever leave.
Luckily now, we train at a powerlifting gym. ammonia, chalkWpuke buckets, harcore porn on the walls, and the loudest thrash metal playing 24/7. When i first took her there, she wanted to leave, immediatley. Now, with how much support the other lifters give, i doubt shell ever leave.
Man I need to find a better gym!
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Only a couple of times has anyone ever taken off any of my weights from what i was using, or questioned weird things i do (and i use bands/chains/boards all the time.).
Wow. So no one walks off with your 500lbs + barbell and 150lbs dbs? Really?
I know some women, especially beginners, can easily be intimidated. For me, this is my home turf and I get mad and don't back down... But is this common? Do you women run into this crap too - haven't men figured out that we have just as much of a right to the weights as they do?
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even as a beginner I was lucky enough to have polite men around me at the gym....Now I have lots of friends who are regulars there...and the new lads...they come to me for advice
My gym actually has a small "womens only" area. Is that unusual, or do many of you have those too at your gym?
I agree with Jane, I hate these areas! I kinda understand the reasoning behind but it's more of a "sandbox" concept to me.
I'm truly shocked at this whole men-being-rude-to-women-in-the-weights-area issue. Never had anything like that happen to me...well some stare but I guess that's just what (some) men do Totally don't know how I'd react in any of the situations described earlier...Awful!
Luckily now, we train at a powerlifting gym. ammonia, chalkWpuke buckets, harcore porn on the walls, and the loudest thrash metal playing 24/7. When i first took her there, she wanted to leave, immediatley. Now, with how much support the other lifters give, i doubt shell ever leave.
Wait, I get the point of the chalk, the puke buckets, and the thrash metal...but what's the purpose of the hardcore porn?
__________________
"Men are taught to apologize for their weaknesses, women for their strengths." - Lois Wyse
Honestly I have never encountered any of these jerk-offs in my gym. I am not sure if it is my gym or if it is me. I read a comment from someone else, not sure if it was in this thread or another one, that if you carry yourself with confidence and act like you know what you are doing, people will assume that you know what you are doing. I think that is pretty accurate. And maybe that is why I have never encountered these jerk-offs. Even when I didn't know exactly what I was doing (like the first time I tried the DB Snatch) I still faked it and acted like I did. After all, I don't know any of those jokers anyway, I don't care what they think of me!
To the OP - I am inclined to think that guy is just a jerk all the time and it has nothing to do with you or the fact that you are female.
That is very serious sounding, perhaps we should have porn everywhere!
I wonder what this would look like in an all-female heavy lifting gym? Lots of pictures of shirtless firemen holding kittens, maybe, or Brad Pitt doing the dishes with no pants on (shot from behind, naturally). Or maybe just George Clooney needing help opening a jar...nekkid.
__________________
"Men are taught to apologize for their weaknesses, women for their strengths." - Lois Wyse
I wonder what this would look like in an all-female heavy lifting gym? Lots of pictures of shirtless firemen holding kittens, maybe, or Brad Pitt doing the dishes with no pants on (shot from behind, naturally). Or maybe just George Clooney needing help opening a jar...nekkid.
I got started in a women-only gym. No porn on the walls, but there was plenty of locker-room talk out on the floor, and aerobics classes featured songs like "Short Dick Man". Good times!
I got started in a women-only gym. No porn on the walls, but there was plenty of locker-room talk out on the floor, and aerobics classes featured songs like "Short Dick Man". Good times!
I wonder what this would look like in an all-female heavy lifting gym? Lots of pictures of shirtless firemen holding kittens, maybe, or Brad Pitt doing the dishes with no pants on (shot from behind, naturally). Or maybe just George Clooney needing help opening a jar...nekkid.
I wonder what this would look like in an all-female heavy lifting gym? Lots of pictures of shirtless firemen holding kittens, maybe, or Brad Pitt doing the dishes with no pants on (shot from behind, naturally). Or maybe just George Clooney needing help opening a jar...nekkid.
You assume the majority of members would be straight. I'm rather doubtful, actually. At least, assuming it's not all just aerobics and cardio...
I've has some experiences with this myself. Some of the men at the gym I go to really think that they should get priority over some of the machines. It's like, "well she's not even going to do that much weight, so what a watse. Why don't you give the machine to somebody who's actually going to make good use of it?" I've just got a few losers at my gym, but they are probably not representaive of the population at large. (I hope.)
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The worst problem I have at my gym are men leaving their damn plates everywhere. I was so excited when I caught an offender wandering off from the squat rack. "hi, excuse me. Were you done?" "yeah" and he goes shuffling off.
"HEY, why don't you get your weights off of it then" He looked totally annoyed as I stood there as I would if it were my 15 year old shrugging off chores but whatever.
Other than that, no one has ever given me an ounce of grief.