Anne, I'd second the recommendation to check out Leigh's books. I would really avoid New Rules of Lifting if I were you--at least until you get some of the metabolic issues addressed. A program like that will likely tax your system too much (in my opinion--if this is wrong, I'm sure others will chime ine) and it's not a fat loss program per se (though it has been successfully used that way by some).
It sounds to me like you need to educate yourself on the basics of fat loss, etc., and you might have some repair work to do, so I'd look at Leigh's books and really read the material.
A link would be good, right?
Leigh Peele's Fat Loss Troubleshoot.