We only have your words with your emphasis to go on here. I'm certainly no ED expert, but it seems to me that if you are having that level of problem with a single food that you cannot say "I'm not having that right now" to the point that you are depressed about not eating a particular food - I think you need more help and more mental work than we can give you on a faceless forum.
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Quote:
Water babies singing in a lily-pool delight
Blue powder monkeys praying in the dead of night
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