I think Pete and Aoife both said it very well. You may not have a choice about "stunning" someone - and it takes a LOT of experience to be able to make that kind of choice between, for example, destroying a knee versus hitting 2" higher and just making them limp. Then put that in an adrenaline-fueled "real life" scenario and all bets are out the window.
Learn to defend yourself, but first learn to avoid a fight. As a result of real martial arts training, the more you feel able to really defend yourself, the less you'll want or need to prove that you can. Walking away is ALWAYS the first and best choice. Fighting is only an option when there is no possible way to avoid a physical fight.
And yes, in real life, most fights end up on the ground. But you have to survive the part that gets you there in the first few moments.
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