Quote:
Originally Posted by John Izzo
Here is my suggestion--and I have had many gay clients in the past--and tehya have always been my better clients (training wise).
CE-I feel for you. You are in a tight spot. However, your level of comfort is important-this early in your career. Your first few years in this industry will dictate your longevity in the field. If you are uncomfortable with one of your clients (be him gay flirting with you, paraplegic, or Klansman), you have to establish yourself not only in the eyes of your projected customers, but in yourself. If you approach your client and tell him you are uncomfortable, it may make subsequent sessions even more uncomfortable, or you will lose a client.
If I were you, it would have stopped the first time I came to his house and he was wearing boxers. Not to say you "let him", but you must project that you are in control of the session and you are a professional. The mentality should be, "I am here to provide you a service". I cannot effectively provide you that service, if I am not comfortable with my surroundings".
I think the bottom line is...it doesn't matter that your client is gay and hitting on you...you are uncomfortable. Your lack of comfort has rendered you loss of control of the session (hence the continuous gabbing) and lack of respect (as a professional) (hadly any exercise).
I hope you understand what I am saying. You can place any person in this scenario (doesn't mean just his sexuality). It could be a guy that has firearms all over his house that make you uncomfortable. The point is, tell him you are uncomfortable with his forthcomings and if he is not acceptable of your feelings, then refund hi the remaining sessions.
I would like to see you gain control of this steering wheel and keep him. I think it will do alot for you as a professional in the long run.
Just my 2 cents....
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Everything you said is right on. I am one of those people who take things and am almost "too nice" then all of a sudden i explode and tell someone exactly how i feel. This isnt good and I should take control from the beginning. I just dont like conflict, then after it goes on long enough there is MAJOR conflict. This is not from my training experience, but from my relationship experience.
Anyway I agree with everything you said and I have to learn to be more in control. Its hard when you are starting out, I mean here I am starting to make money and this happens and threatens to take it away. Still, money is only worth so much. I am confident that my business is going to take off and I will look back and think "man i cant believe i put up with that for $500".
Anyway I am in a tight spot but if this continues I really don't think i will keep working with him. Its ridiculous...like you said it could be firearms in the home, a aggressive pit bull that tries to eat you everytime you come in, or any other number of factors. This time it just happens to me a very flirty, aggressive gay man who thinks he can convert straight people...lol.