Lots of great words and ideas here already so I doubt my 2 cents is going to be original. I'll just suggest you consider a "What If?" situation... as in, "What if your son was in the situation you're in now, what would you do/what would you tell him to do?"
That said, my other thought is that you try to avoid the all-or-nothing approach that we all tend to saddle ourselves with. It leads to a lot of negativity as we tend to focus on the things left undone rather than the good things we have done. "Not all who wander are lost..."
Lastly, I'll echo the suggestion that professional help should be sought. Internet forums are one thing, but face to face dialogue with a trained professional will prove far more effective.
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