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Old 12-29-2007, 12:58 AM   #32 (permalink)
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Windsor, ON
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Just need to get some stuff out, not much to see here so feel free to click the 'Back' button.



Been a rough few days this week. After having someone by your side to celebrate with for so long it can be kind of depressing when they aren't there anymore. I am finding it hard to even watch some of the old movies I used to love. At times there will be a scene that reminds me of her or just a nice moment that reminds of happy times and it brings the pain right back to the front.

I have also still been having trouble with some dreams. I find myself dreaming not about her specifically but she was in it. It didn't upset me or anything of that sort but I still don't really like it, in fact I would much rather forget it. I am also ashamed to admit having a dream recently of punching out the new douchebag and I remember the immense feeling of satisfaction I had from doing it. Then I awoke and felt ashamed for it. What worries me most of all is that I don't have these thoughts during the day, it's not like I sit around and think about her or anything, at most there are brief flashes of things that remind me but then they pass.

I am still working on staying positive though. I had some major car troubles but rather then look to the negative I worked my schedule to allow me the week off so I could go back home and help my step-dad fix my car and got to spend some good time with him. Thanks for letting me get this out, was kind of bothering me, I need to get a handle on this dream stuff though, it can't be healthy can it?

PS. I wanted to edit my initial post, and the thread title but couldn't find an edit button so if a mod sees this can you drop me a PM.

PPS. I still miss my kitty a whole lot
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