[shaneb]

I'm stuck in a chicken or egg kind of loop here and I need some advice.

I've been working out/lifting pretty steadily for a couple years now, and I have really enjoyed it. I started out as kind of a skinny fat guy. Tall and lean but still overweight. I'm now moderately defined skinny skinny guy. I want to be a big WELL defined guy. Hopefully you followed all that...

My problem is that I don't know what to focus on first. I have lost a lot of body fat but I still don't have visible abs and I really want that.

So basically I find myself in one of two cycles most of the time. I'm either eating with a deficit to try to get my bf% down so I have really good definition with the muscle that I have, and end up feeling too skinny when I look in the mirror, or I eat to create a surplus and feel like I am gaining too much fat and covering up any gains that I might be making. Granted I try to eat mostly good foods in both cases...

Whats the smart way to proceed here? I just need some expert advice on the best way to eventually be that big well defined guy.

So should I focus on size first and then worry about definition later? Or should I get defined first and thus use that as motivation to add to the muscle that I can see?

(If your answer is going to start with "It depends" then please with all due respect, don't bother, I'm already confused enough)

Thanks

Shane