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Originally Posted by gregl515
I don't necessarily agree. If pain gets so bad that we have to change it will move us to change. Frequently, I think it is between what is known and what is unknown. We stay where we are many times because even if it is painful it is what we know. We don't know what happens if we get thin. What if all those things that we told ourselves would happen if we just got in shape don't happen? How do we deal with that? Where do we go then?
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My point here would be that your perception and association of the pain in this instance (so bad that it motivates change) is still part of the underlying basic motivation of changing the way you feel. It is part of the avoidance of pain principle. We will do anything to avoid pain and gain pleasure or minimize pain. In this instance the only thing that has changed is your association and perception of the pain.
Again, with regard to "We stay where we are many times because even if it is painful it is what we know. We don't know what happens if we get thin. What if all those things that we told ourselves would happen if we just got in shape don't happen? How do we deal with that? Where do we go then?" That uncertainty of what will happen next if you get in shape or get thin is a feeling of uncomfortability. You are more comfortable staying where you are because the uncertainty creates the perception of a "change of state". - insecurity, vulnerability, uncertainty, etc. These are all different gradients of the pain I spoke about earlier and in my previous post. The person in that situation is creating a sort of paralysis. Your string of questions underscores my point on the matter. "What if"...the association is instantly linked with feelings of failure, rejection, any numerous degrees of negativity. These are painful thoughts. And in that case, the notion of changing requires too much effort, and it is perceived too painful to do anything.
Bottom line: Change your associations, your perceptions, your state of reference and you will change your life!
Newman